Women's perspectives of guns and self defense

Just before Christmas, 30 women in this area participated in a firearms and personal safety course sponsored by the Wakulla County Sheriff's Office. Many wanted to learn to shoot, feeling a .38 Special or similar handgun would be their best defense against the unthinkable: That they too might face a violent death as did the much admired and gentle soul, FSU nurse Cheryl Dunlap.

I can understand their feelings in part, having lived here during Ted Bundy's murderous spree in 1978. In fact, the Volkswagen he stole was found abandoned on the street where I live, right across from my front door.

Six years later, the so-called "beauty queen killer" Christopher Bernard Wilder was on the FBI's most wanted list as a serial killer who abducted and raped at least 10 women and murdered at least seven. His rampage had started in Florida, where he was believed to have raped girls ages 10 and 12 during 1983. Wilder committed suicide in the spring of 1984, but fear was running high that year as Tallahassee was declared Florida's rape capital.

I signed up for a 10-week self-defense course at the Tallahassee Police Department, partly as a journalist, partly as a young woman who didn't like the idea of being a victim-in-waiting.

Our class met two nights a week — quite a commitment when I think back on it — and we were taught by a rugged former New York cop and ex-Marine named Ron Kazoroski. He was assisted by Sgt. Donna Schultz, a lithe former dancer on the crime-prevention team, and Sgt. Doug Farrow, who was memorably quotable:

"Women don't have to put up with some of the things they do," he said, lecturing us about attacks in bars, cars or walking along in public places. "If a man touches you where you don't want to be touched, he loses his right to a pain-free life."

If the women in Wakulla County have already purchased or own weapons, then it is better that they are learning how to handle a gun with some confidence. Now they will feel as if they have an equalizer; whether they would use it another matter.

But what I learned in my self-defense course, and have heard repeated and reinforced many times since, is that it is mighty hard to actually shoot to kill a person — even if you are familiar with weapons, even if the person is viciously coming after you. Professional law-enforcement officers who are trained to shoot to kill are often traumatized by the experience.

There are alternatives. The one that was pounded into me, and which I still use every time I am approaching a vast parking garage, heading toward a car-filled parking lot, walking alone as dark descends, or sometimes just in a large crowd, is awareness.

The class, which at first I described lightly as "an urban finishing school for women," became ever-more compelling as we learned how foolish women (and, yes, men) are to assume there is little to be done if someone chooses to attack us.

We were trained in physical maneuvers, some of the less-refined martial arts moves that could help us fight if necessary before we could flee. Quick kicks or punches to the throat, groin and eyes are what most attackers wouldn't expect. Surprise is your weapon, too.

The class was graphic and taught us something about pain, which many women don't experience as males often do. From boyhood on, boys fall out of trees, wrestle in schoolyards and get used to coaches shouting, "I don't care if it does hurt."

But we were also training our minds during those 10 weeks, and learning to exude a body language that can work as a protective barrier. Survey your environment, walk tall and proceed to where you're going with purpose. Have your car keys in hand when you leave the mall, the theater, the classroom, your house. You don't want to look disoriented and lost as you search for your parked car or still be fumbling in your purse for your keys when you reach it.

Over and over, the lesson of self-defense is prevention. Be alert. Be aware. Avoid the dangerous situation to begin with. Talk, talk and talk some more if you're attacked, or scream and make a commotion that will buy you a chance to flee or attract help.

A few weeks before the course ended, I'd jotted down in a journal how I was beginning to identify with Clint Eastwood when he growled, "Go ahead. Make my day."

"Tonight I felt this animal-like rush to fight back," I wrote. "My feelings of vulnerability have flown away. Being attacked would make me so angry, I honestly believe the man would be in some jeopardy."

But that was just before Kazoroski brought out the guns and knives. He began demonstrating techniques for fighting an armed attacker, but cautioned that this is an option only when your death is a distinct possibility — when there is absolutely nothing left to lose and when you are emotionally, psychologically and physically willing to kill.

Repelled by the idea of grabbing a knife or gun and turning it on another human being, I remember that my animal-boldness went into hibernation. I often have wondered if it would come back if ever I was direly threatened.

I am utterly grateful that hasn't happened, but I was forever changed by learning there are ways of fighting back. They begin with your mind, your observations, your awareness, your confidence and your physical willingness to fight and feel pain if ever the unthinkable is happening to you.

Carrying a weapon might make you feel safer, but practicing awareness will make you be safer.

"Until yesterday, I good-naturedly tolerated my husband's interest in Operator skills and lifestyle. However, when I worked outside at our place in the country, I chose not to carry a pistol, even though he gently encouraged me to do so.

Again and again, I told him it is just not convenient to lug that pistol around while stacking wood. After all, I would continue, we live in this sleepy, little town where nothing bad ever happens. I would then give him the old 'whatever-eye-roll'.

That all changed yesterday! I'm writing to you, John, to proclaim that he, and you, are SO RIGHT, and always have been!

Early yesterday one morning, we were our walking our two dogs in our large back yard. We both caught a glimpse of something running across our driveway. We started moving back toward our house. Then, we saw them all!

A group of six, large, wild dogs were running in a pack, digging wildly under a fence in an effort to get at the neighbors' horses. At once, they noticed us and all began running in our direction. Luckily, we, and the dogs, got back to the house in time. My heroic husband, pistol at the ready, brought up the rear, covering me.

We found out later that our neighbors tried, mostly unsuccessfully, fighting off the dogs with a shovel and trash-can lid. Their horses were seriously injured. Local deputies, when they finally arrived, were far more concerned about having to pay the dog catcher overtime than they were about protecting any of us.

I, at long last, learned to put what you and my husband teach into my heart and mind forever! As you've reminded us, we are all individually responsible for our own safety. That now has special meaning for me!"

Comment: Fortunately, an important lesson was learned without a painful price, this time!

by Melissa Allison, Director KC3

I will admit it right from the start; I am a new gun owner. Less than a year ago I would have been more likely to be a member of the Million Mom March than a board member of the Kentucky Coalition to Carry Concealed. However, as the saying goes, "Times change" and so have my views of guns and gun ownership. I now understand the value of protecting the right to carry concealed weapons. My change of heart resulted in shooting IDPA, joining KC3, and becoming a member of the board of directors. As a member, I have taken the task of writing a column for the newsletter that specifically addresses the needs of women as they relate to concealed carry and gun ownership. In future issues I would like to address various topics of interest to women; however, for this issue I thought it would be appropriate to simply introduce myself and chronicle my journey into the realm of concealed carry.

Ironically enough my first real exposure to guns occurred in California, that state which is rapidly limiting access to handguns. I never had any real interest in guns and certainly never saw the need to own one for myself, but one day my husband suggested that we take a gun safety course together at the local range. (Allow me to interject at this point that my husband is the sole reason that I became interested in guns, so men, listen up…if you are having a hard time convincing your significant other to give guns a chance, continue reading; I am going to give you some tips for softening her resistance). Of course my husband’s suggestion met with my "misunderstanding" of guns; after all, I am a nurse. I gave the normal response: "Guns are dangerous" to which my husband responded, "That’s why we are taking a gun safety course." Wanting something that my husband and I could do together, I gave in to his petition and signed up for the two-hour class.

As the day of our class approached I became more and more nervous. I did not tell any of my friends for fear that they would laugh at me and ask when I was going to join the militia. I thought guns were for rednecks and hunters; certainly no respected citizen would carry one. I was soon to find out that I was wrong. Our class, containing a mom and her son, some computer engineers, as well as my husband and me, was held at the local indoor range. Now you must understand that this was the first time I had ever set foot inside a gun range and the first time I had ever seen a gun fired in real life. I was scared to death after seeing some of the guns people were firing; I told my husband that I did not want a gun that shot fire. He laughed. The class turned out to be just the thing for someone like me; we did not even touch a gun for an hour. We learned the different parts of a gun and how they worked, but more importantly we learned how to handle a gun safely. After safety lessons, it was time to shoot. The instructor gave us both a .22 pistol and a .22 revolver. That was perfect! Men, let me say that if you are trying to get your significant other to be interested in guns do not start them out shooting your .45 or Desert Eagle. Women, in general, are not impressed with the power of guns; they want something they are comfortable shooting. I was comfortable shooting the .22 pistol (It didn’t shoot fire…hehe). The class hooked me. I liked the adrenaline rush that shooting gave me as well as the competitive aspect of trying to shoot that little ‘X’ in the middle of the target.

Before moving to Kentucky, we visited that range several more times; I felt comfortable there. The minute you walked in the door of the range someone asked if you were carrying a gun, and if you were, you had to show it to him. Men, if you are trying to convince your significant other that shooting is safe, do not take them to a range where people are consistently breaking safe handling rules. The other nice thing about that range was that you could rent guns from them. This gave me the opportunity to try out different guns and decide for myself which one I liked. My husband never pushed a certain gun on me; he encouraged me to find something that fit me. Another lesson to learn, men, do not assume that your significant other will like the gun you like, that a Glock is the best pistol for beginners (I hate them), or that women prefer a revolver. These are all sentiments that I encountered, and none of them proved true for me, except that my husband and I both like our Sig P225.

Once my husband and I moved to Kentucky, we got in contact with Charles Riggs who introduced us to the idea of concealed carry. I had never considered this as a possibility; I thought it was unnecessary and dangerous. However, I paid attention to the statistics that my husband placed before me; he never tried to sway my opinion, only presented me with the facts allowing me to make my own informed decision. Once again, men, women are not stupid; give them the appropriate information and they will more than likely arrive at the right conclusion. Statistics did not fail in my case, and I soon realized the value of carrying a concealed weapon to protect myself. I claimed the phrase I saw on a girl’s t-shirt: "I refuse to be a victim." That is where I am today, a female member of KC3 fighting for my right not to be a victim, and that is why I have decided to write this column. I want to help other women understand that guns are not what the media makes them out to be; that in the hands of responsible citizens, they are a valid means of self-defense. I also want to address the needs that women face when considering concealed carry. So watch your newsletter in the future for tips and advice, and hopefully we will all learn something together.

Little Sure Shot" Annie Oakley became one of the first women superstars as a renown markswoman on Buffalo Bill's Wild West Show in the late 1800's, her fancy shooting opened the flood gates to the idea that women had a place behind the trigger of a gun.

Although much has changed since the days of Oakley, women and guns remain somewhat of a taboo subject, while in recent years, the popularity of firearms with women has reached an all time high.

According to a survey taken by the National Rifle Association in 2004, over 17 million American women own some type of firearm.

Slowly, guns have been finding their way into the female populace for reasons ranging from hunting to a sense of security to self-defense.

There is a certain image that is associated with female gun ownership, one of strength and power, but there is also something provocative to it as well. The appeal of firearms among women may be the impression of toughness that exudes from them; something that that says, "keep back."

Women are perceived as more delicate and helpless than their male counterparts, they are the targets of more violent crimes and therefore carry a greater fear of coming into harm's way.

When Smith & Wesson introduced their LadySmith model in 1989, they used the slogan that the handgun would "manage to be elegant without sacrificing any of their practicality."

Taking their message to women a step further, they tread upon a woman's propensity to nurture as a mother figure by reminding women of their responsibility to not only protect the family, but also protect themselves as caretakers of their loved ones.

Anti-gun mom turned firearm-advocate
Fellow gun-toting female Marcia Grann O'Brien, editor for the Narragansett Times, who has raised three children and is now a proud grandmother, was a self-proclaimed "huge anti-gun mom" when her own kids were growing up.

"I wouldn't even let my boys have posters with guns in them," said O'Brien, a Rhode Island native who lived in New York and then moved back to the Ocean State in 1993.

Oddly enough, it was her passion for the anti-gun movement that spurred her eventually love affair with firearms.

In 1995, O'Brien was in an editor's meeting and got wind of a potential story idea surrounding a group of women who frequently gathered at the Warwick Range to practice shoot. O'Brien decided to cover the story out of a sort of morbid curiosity.

"I wanted to see who those crazy women were," she joked. "I said to myself, 'if you are going to do a story on this, you at least need to shoot a gun.'"

She chose the .22-caliber revolver for her first shot.

"I was hooked the first bullet out," said O'Brien. "I loved it. I can't tell you how wonderful and exhilarating it was trying to hit that bulls eye."

Within a week, O'Brien was a gun owner, with her first purchase being her first love, the .22-caliber. She then moved onto a .38-caliber Smith & Wesson revolver and finished her collection with a .45-caliber Eastern European semi-automatic. Shortly afterward she also obtained her Handgun Carry Permit.

"My kids get a huge kick out of it," she said when thinking back to her days as an anti-gun mom, calling her transition "beyond bizarre."

Although O'Brien sticks to target shooting and does not partake in hunting, she said she is not against the idea.
In terms of self-defense, O'Brien made clear that she would absolutely use her weapon to protect herself if she saw no other alternative.

"Running away is always the first choice, but if you can't get away, then you shoot," she clarified. "I feel much safer carrying."

In O'Brien's opinion, regardless of women's slight presence in the gun world compared to that of men, she finds that a women's touch makes for a superior shot.

"Women are better shooters because they don't have a macho thing to prove. So when you instruct them, they listen."

Local gun clubs
Eric Gould, president of the local Wincheck Gun Club in West Greenwich said he has noticed more female members frequenting the club in the last couple of years, although not as many as he would have expected due to its growing popularity.

According to Gould, most of the women he notices inside the club are members' wives who are either there to keep their husbands company or maybe fire off a few rounds for fun.

Although the numbers aren't staggering, Gould estimated that roughly a half a dozen single women have, in recent years, attended the club's firearm training class that they hold once or twice a year.

When the club hosts training classes for West Greenwich police cadets, Gould said he has noticed "quite a few" young women in attendance.

He also said that he has even noticed a handful of "little girls" when the club puts on their firearm education classes for children, as parents want their kids to know gun safety at an early age.

Although, many of the women go to the club's safety courses in order to obtain a permit to carry for protection purposes, according to Gould.

While statistically, women appear to get involved with guns for safety issues, Gould argued that those women who shoot for sport and those who shoot for safety are, in his experience, "all across the board."

"I've seen nurses who want to know how to shoot a gun, especially those who work in the city," said Gould, "but I also know a woman who loves to go deer hunting."

"You see a lot more women buying motorcycles, too," he said, noting that women have been moving out of their set gender roles for some time now. "They are becoming much more self sufficient."

Hunting, sport, and the Constitution
Pat Thompson, regional coordinator for Women in the Outdoors, a program that promotes basic gun safety, preservation of the hunting tradition and educational outdoor opportunities, picked up her first firearm 15 years ago and has never looked back.

Thompson has shot sporting clays competitively in Texas and New York State shooting contests, and she now devotes much of her time to the Women in the Outdoors, coordinating events around Rhode Island and Connecticut.

Like many women, Thompson began shooting as a way to spend time with her husband, who would shoot skeet with his friends often. According to Thompson, her and husband "did everything together," and therefore she would find him reluctant to join his friends at skeet shoots because he felt it was taking time away from her.

After seeing an advertisement in the newspaper for shotgun lessons, Thompson decided to give it a shot, literally.

"I really, really enjoyed it," she said, "and it turns out that I was halfway decent."

As Thompson got more involved with competitive shooting, she became concerned that her constitutional right to bear arms was coming under attack, so she took the road of caution.

Using her already extensive knowledge of firearms, Thompson became certified in shotgun instruction and took several hunting safety courses in order to prove she was a responsible, safety-concerned gun owner.

For her, hunting became the next step in her gun career, although she explained that she never thought of herself joining the hunting community. After deciding to keep her husband company on a hunt, Thompson brought her gun along, but didn't anticipate using it... that was, of course, until she laid eyes on her soon-to-be first kill.

"I saw a deer coming through the woods and I picked up my gun and just fired," she recalled. "It was the most natural thing in the world to harvest an animal."

On the other end of the spectrum, Thompson is also an advocate of women carrying firearms to protect themselves.

"A lot of protection against predators is confidence," stated Thompson, "predators lean toward women who appear to be weak or unsure of themselves, an easy target."

She finds that women who are in possession of a handgun carry themselves differently, deterring potential threats before they happen as well as offering women a means to defend themselves if a dangerous situation arises.

CBS 11 News) DALLAS North Texas police detectives say there's no new information about a serial rapist who has terrorized 19 victims.

One of the women attacked is making sure her attacker knows she's taking steps to make sure it never happens again. Kathy Smith knows she's not a typical rape victim. She's soft-spoken, but she has a bold message. "I don't want to ever let myself be in that position again," said Smith. "The only one who can really protect me, is me." Smith was one of the first victims of a serial rapist who has not yet been caught. "I feel like I came close to dieing that night," Smith said. "If it's me or him, it's going to be him." In August, Frisco police started distributing a composite of the man who has robbed, beaten, stabbed and even killed one of his victims. In November of 2005, Smith said the rapist burst into her apartment in Plano. He terrorized her, ransacked the apartment and held a gun to her head, she said. "I thought he was about to spread my brains all over my bedroom wall, and I just did what I could to get out of there alive," Smith said. Since then, she's experience nightmares, post traumatic stress and she has been angry at the man who raped her. But Smith has not been silent. She's now applying for her license to carry a concealed handgun, and she encourages others do the same. "If someone were to break into my home again, they wouldn't find someone pulling the covers up and screaming. They would find a gun pointed at them," said Smith.

Smith says she knows the serial rapist could strike again. She wants to warn other women not to let their guard down. "You think locking your doors is going to keep someone like that out? No. If they want in, they're coming in," she said. After the attack, Smith moved to another apartment. She got a dog for protection and had crime prevention officers analyze her home. She warns other women that it's still not enough. "Even if you have to put bars on your windows to keep people like that out, do it," she said.

For years, Nashville real estate agent Kim Hoard considered toting a gun for her safety at work and while traveling alone with her two children, ages 7 and 10.

She recently took action when she started getting harassing telephone calls from a man who saw her photo in an advertisement.

Maryland Women Push For Shall-Issue CCW: Maryland Shall Issue, Inc. notes that this Friday at noon, dozens of women are expected to show up for the Lawyers Mall press conference and then hearing on HB 228, a bill to make the process of granting concealed carry permits non-discretionary.